Psalm 139:7

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Monster

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His handprints, imprinted
On her skin, chest, her thighs.
They draw my red-ringed eyes
To the unseen -his prize
Lost, that which showed his lies.
Society decries
Us. Who blames their surmise?

He causes me to despise
Myself. My babe was unwise.
Her failure to realise
His motivation, implies
I failed her, to advise
Her, as a father. Chastise
Her? I can't. In his cold eyes
She saw goodness. But his guise
Misled her. Led to her demise,
Her brokenness. I hear her cries
As she sleeps, blending with my sighs
For our lost years. It's been hinted
They've drifted off to holy skies.

crazy

Last night I had a dream.

I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.



Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.


In each scene I notic

I dreamt I was talking to people, but they weren't making any sense.

I was walking through a courtyard and I would keep speaking to people-my friends, they spoke english but it was worded so strangely that I didn't know what they meant.

At first I thought they might have a thought disorder, but as more and more people didn't make sense I realised I must have the thought disorder, I was the crazy one.

And there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it.

save yourself.

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if it's a monster
put it down
before it hurts somebody or hurts itself
(monsters can be reckless, you know)
it probably won't survive much longer anyhow

What are you afraid of?

It's so easy to lie to that question. But I don't like lying, so instead I avoid. "Oh, you know...stuff. *Followed by a conspicuous change of subject* "  Yeah, not one of my more brilliant moments but the point remains the same, it's a difficult question to ask yourself, let alone answer.


I think it's difficult because it requires understanding and accepting yourself, no matter how fragile you are. And that means acknowledging your weaknesses.
So here's your answer. Even if it's too little, too late. Even if it probably not all of my fears, because I'm not completely aware of them.


It may only be the truth but it's all I have.. So I hope that means something.
I'm afraid of injections because I don't like being forced into things.
I'm afraid of death because I don't know what it is.
I'm afraid of not embracing life because I don't want to waste a moment.
I'm afraid of letting my guard down because when you care you get hurt.
I'm afraid of being totally honest because when you leave yourself so exposed who knows what you'll think.
I'm afraid of love because it can't be controlled.