Saturday, June 5, 2010

because this isn't twilight.


"Why did you say that?", Jonesy said, his eyes searching her. Lee's eyes widened and she shrugged her shoulders, praying it would come across as apathy and not her stomach coiling and recoiling, as if her nerves were on fire. She could hear the words hanging in the air, the words he so badly wanted to say but couldn't.
"Why does it matter?", she choked out, amazed how his physical presence alone could affect her.
Now it was his turn to shrug, before -after a few moments of studying her- turning and walking away. It wasn't that she didn't love him, it was that she'd proved it to him enough times already and now it was his turn. That she wanted him to prove this was a mutual feeling, this love. But he couldn't, because he had too much too lose and he didn't know if there was anything to gain.
Because this wasn't Romeo and Juliet or Pride and Prejudice, this was real life, and he probably never had loved her, and he would never come back, and Lee would find another boy with laughter in his eyes and warmth in his mouth and give her heart to him, and hope he would take care of it because it's the only one she's got thank-you-very-much.
"Fucking coward." Lee muttered as she shook her head, her dark hair loose around her face catching her tears as she bent down to collect the shards of her self that lay scattered at her feet like glass.

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